I went for meranti last weekend and the facilitator asked us a question, “What’s the hurtful thing someone said about you?”
I gave an answer at that time but now that I have more time to think about it, I think the answer was not good enough.
These are what hurt me most:
“You only know how to study.”
“Huh? So apart from studying, you don’t have other talents.”
“What else can you do apart from studying?”
“You are just book/ exam smart.”
“You only have qualifications.”
Yes, I worked hard to attain decent grades in my exams and I worked hard to attain my qualifications. But it does not mean I am relying on my qualifications themselves to get ahead in life. Who gives you the right to judge my life and my career potential? I really don’t like to be judged in such a one-dimensional way but at the same time, I do not feel compelled to share the other interests in my life.
Yesterday’s session only reminds me how words can hurt people especially when it’s stereotypical and judgmental. I can’t stop what other people say or perceive the world but I can try my best to stop myself from passing judgment on others. I need to work hard and try to be the kind of person that I want to see in the world.